hmmmmm?

Ive been writing in this blog for months ...I lov it...I love the sense of security i have of knowing that noone really follows it ...Im someone who is too afraid to share my innermost feelings with people ...this way i can open up ...yet still keep it to my chest . I ve been really ill this last week as in literally bed ridden ..ive thought alot. kind of about who id like to be and how id like to function in society and im still not sure ... I dont know what i am supposed to contribute and what i could do that would make me happy forever. I guess age is catching up with me .....